


End of my rope

by berettajane



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Fatherhood, Motherhood, Parenthood, Protective Dean Winchester, Reader-Insert, Self-Doubt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-15
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-05-07 06:49:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14665569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/berettajane/pseuds/berettajane
Summary: Parenting isn't always what it's cracked up to be.  This is just a glimpse into a rough night.





	End of my rope

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the gif below, which I do not own.

                    

You knew parenting would be hard, but the only shit you’d heard about was no sleep because all babies do is eat, poop, and cry.  No one told you you would walk around aimlessly because you couldn’t settle your mind down, no matter how little sleep you’ve had.  No one told you you’d feel like an alien inside your own body and a monster inside your own mind.  

On one of your worry-filled wanderings, you hear a clatter in kitchen, causing you to investigate.  You crouch instinctively, preparing to fight an invader in your home.  When you enter the kitchen, you see Dean.  His shoulders are tense, working a brush inside of a bottle he can’t seem to get clean.  His jaw is tense and his eyes are red-rimmed with exhaustion.  He’s in the same boat you are.  He doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing any more than you do.  

He never had an example of a parent like you did.  He raised Sam, but acted on pure instinct or mimicked Bobby’s actions when they weren’t at his house.  He’s doing the best he can and loves you both with his whole heart, which you just shattered with your low-blow comments about how he doesn’t help or doesn’t know what he’s doing.  

He’s feeling exhausted and underappreciated.  You’re just drained and you don’t feel like yourself.  You don’t recognize your body anymore, and feel like you don’t know what the fuck you’re doing.  You just can’t seem to communicate that to him because he always told you how good of a mother you would be and you don’t want to admit that you’re a failure, or at least feel like one.  

Dean turns when he hears you sob, seeing you slide down the door jamb with your head in your hands as you curl into a shaking ball.  He drops the objects into the sink, quickly wiping his hands on his sweatpants as he rushes to your aid.

“Baby!  Babe, what’s wrong?  Did something happen?” he asks rapid fire questions while coming to kneel next to you, his stomach in his throat at the mere thought of something happening to the baby.  You shake your head, wrapping your arms around his neck and hugging him like your life depends on it.  He sighs, wrapping his arms around you and swaying back and forth as you sob in his arms.  “I’ve got you, sweetheart, it’s okay,” he whispers, kissing your hair.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think!


End file.
